#lOL hi i haven't forgotten this account

[2tcs]

Danny’s Journal or A Countdown to the Beginning

Summary: A look into the year leading up to the accident from the perspective of a forgotten journal.

February 9, 2002

Dear journal. Mom and Dad said they had a surprise for me and Jazz when we get home from school. Please God don't let it be another ghost gun or something. My hair is still singed from the last one.

Update. It was, in fact, a gun. Jazz now has a mild burn on her arm and is screaming how they need therapy. Not disagreeing but I don't think it's going to happen.

February 12, 2002

Dear journal. Happy birthday. A year ago Jazz gave you to me for my birthday. How my parents haven't accidentally destroyed you I don't know.

Me Tucker, Sam, and Jazz went out to eat for my birthday. Sam even had her family driver take us a town over to try that new restaurant. Well, that's what their excuse was.  I think they were trying to get me out of the house for a little bit since Mom and Dad are going on a rampage through the house disassembling all the appliances. It's 10 pm and I can still hear noise coming from the basement.

March 26, 2002

I have the best idea for an April Fools prank. It involves chez whiz and glitter.

April 1, 2002

The prank worked like a charm. The jocks are going to smell like cheese for weeks. And they ain't ever getting the glitter out.

On the downside. Dash broke my arm and Mom and Dad put a “Fenton Anti-ghost Cast” on me. It kinda glows and makes my arm feel weird.

April 23, 2002

Sam’s birthday party was a glorious disaster this year. Her mom decided to do a princess-themed party. We have been preparing for this day since Sam found one of her mom’s work journals. We managed to sneak paint and glitter bombs into the venue before anyone got there. We even managed to get one on each of the chandeliers. It was awesome. Everyone got covered in black paint and red glitter. 

What we didn’t account for was Grandma Ida hiring professional snake handlers to bring in a bunch of snakes for Sam. The snakes were non-venomous and luckily were all caught after one of the rich people bumped into the table that the snake cage was on. And the paint was non-toxic so it was easy to clean off the snakes too without them getting sick. Still kinda feel bad that the snakes got caught in the crossfire though.

May 20, 2002

🎵Schools out for the summer!🎵 Lol this is going to be so exciting. Our last summer as middle schoolers. Nothing but the big leagues after this!

June 13, 2002

Dad wants to go camping for Father's Day so we're going to head out tomorrow morning. Think I heard them mention Lake Arrowhead. That'll be cool. Haven't fished there before.

June 15, 2002

I don't know how but we're in Gotham. Apparently, there's some stupid ghost conversation going on so we're going to be stuck here for the next week. On the pulse side though I found a really cool cafe not too far from the hotel. And they don’t seem to care if you just hang out as long as their not busy and you buy something. Me and Jazz will probably be spending a lot of time here or at their library. It’s huge and has an entire section of space!

June 16, 2002

Turns out I'm allergic to something called Blood Blossoms. Mom and Dad ended up having some guy try to cleanse me of “the evil spook” after I accidentally brushed up against the flowers he had on his table. Jazz had to convince them to get me to the hospital. Luckily one of the guys walking around had an epi pen. So that helped. Still sucks and now I'm stuck at the hotel while Jazz frets like a mother hen. I don't think she's even realized that she has a rash on her hand from when she threw the flowers away from me.

June 19, 2002

So… Batman is real… wtf? He apparently has some questions for Mom and Dad but they haven't come back yet. He apologized to me and Jazz for waking us up and gave us suckers? Which. Weird. And Jazz threw them away when he left because “stranger danger is still a thing even if they are a hero”. RIP little Root Beer flavored DumDum. You will be missed.

And on the other hand, Robin was pretty cool. He's snarky and brave and hilarious and he is just so cool. 10/10 New favorite Robin. He even gave me a book recommendation for the report I'm supposed to turn in at the start of freshman year.

June 22, 2002

We were supposed to leave Gotham today. We were supposed to finally head to one of the lakes on the way home to do some camping and fishing. We were supposed to have a relaxing time. So please journal. Can you tell me why the giant wannabe scaly just threw the GAV? Now we are going to be stuck in this stupid city for another week while Mom and Dad fix it.

June 24, 2002

I made a new friend! Do you remember that cafe I talked about a few days ago? Well, I met a guy there. His name is Jason. He’s an absolute lit nerd but is way cool. The guy’s got muscles underneath his school uniform too. The guy looks like he could snap me like a twig yet isn’t at all like Dash. Hopefully, we can keep in contact after we head back to Amity. For now, we are planning on meeting up at the cafe tomorrow with our favorite books. I found “Star Stories”at the library so I’m bringing it with me. I don’t know if he likes stars but I hope he likes some of the stories about them.

July 9, 2002

Finally back at home. Dad had smuggled fireworks into the GAV (how they didn’t explode when KC threw it in Gotham idk) so we spent the 4th of July shooting them off at the lake. We ended up going to Lake Erie for the camping trip because Mom heard something at the convention about a ghost hanging out around there. Didn’t see any ghosts but the fishing was good. I even caught a bass the size of my head! All around it was really fun! Oh and the stars were so clear! The Summer Triangle was so clear you could point out Vega, Deneb, and Altair! It was so cool! Did you know that Vega is in the Lyra constellation? Or Deneb is in the Cygnus Constellation. And Altair is a part of the Aquila constellation!

Maybe I should ask if Mom and Dad could get me another journal for charting the stars. I’ll need the practice if I want to become an astronaut.

July 29, 2002

It’s a good thing that I got two of everything when me, Sam, and Tucker went shopping for school supplies. I got a lot of new space-themed stuff but the moment I got home Dad insisted on ghost-proofing my new backpack… It melted. I don’t even know how he managed to melt a canvas bag. It didn’t even catch fire first. Just started melting the moment Dad started spraying his new “Fenten Ecto-Rejecto Spray” on it. Wtf Dad.

On the plus side, Sam found a new coffin backpack and Tucker was able to get a new bag that had a pouch that he can put the walkman he got yesterday for his birthday. He is so hyped about it. 

August 6, 2002

School starts next week and I am so hyped. Finally going to be a high schooler. Cool Kids Club here we go!

August 15, 2002

Kill me now. May the Gods strike me down and end my suffering. May the Faits find me lacking and cut my string. May the Crone tear me from the tapestry, the mother rejects my thread from the loom and the maiden take the wool of my youth and set it aside.

Sam has just informed me that that isn’t quite what the Mother, Maiden, and Crone do but whatever. Just know that everything sucks because apparently someone called the house phone and told Mom and Dad that there was a ghost in the school. The A-listers are blaming me for ruining their high school debut.

August 30, 2002

Mom and Dad have started making more noise in the lab than normal. It’s gotten to the point that Jazz has been spending more time at the library to study. Speaking of Jazz, she has been obsessing over self-help and psychology books lately. I mean. Jazz has always talked up therapy but now she’s kinda getting snooty about it. Sam suggested we start hanging out at that gazebo thingy at the park so we can get our work done on the nicer days. We’ll have to hang at Tucker's place though on the rainy days. Sam’s parents have decided that it’s time to put their foot down and get Sam to “socialize with your actual peers Sammy-kins so that you can make better connections and start networking” or whatever. So basically Sam’s mom doesn’t want her to be associated with us plebs I guess.

September 8, 2002

Mom and Dad repurposed the fridge so they could put samples in it. Apparently, the one in the lab broke. The green stuff in the tubes kinda creeps me out. Jazz is yelling at them about it. I kinda agree. Cross-contamination anyone? Think I’m gonna eat out at Nasty more often.

September 28, 2002

Either I’m going crazy or the leftover chicken and noodle soup in the fridge was moving. Like the noodles were wiggling around like worms or something. Jazz ordered pizza.

October 5, 2002

There are new wires in the house now and they glow? Mom said that they had some sort of breakthrough and are using the samples that they have to coat some of the tech in the house to “ecto-proof” it. Apparently, the ectoplasm doesn’t like electronics so they weren’t really able to mix it with tech too well. Some of Mom’s blueprints look like Star Wars blasters. Dad’s are less impressive.

October 29, 2002

Mom and Dad have locked me and Jazz in our rooms because of the “Ghost Menaces”. Me and Jazz have both taped warning signs on our windows so some brave trick-or-treaters don’t accidentally get hurt.

November 1, 2002

The signs worked but I saw Mom and Dad taking off in the GAV around midnight. Whatever. Me and Tucker did manage to reach a new level in DOOM last night so that was cool. And it’s World Vegan Day today so Sam is going to take us out to eat at a vegan place for dinner. I have no clue what Tucker’s going to eat. Well probably get it to-go so he can get something.

I found out where Mom and Dad went last night. The cops showed up and gave Mom and Dad a ticket for destroying a part of the park's water fixture. Someone had organised a haunted forest thing in the park and my parents went absolute ape.

November 2, 2002

Who told Mom and Dad about Dia de Los Muertos? Or that there was a little remembrance celebration/party thing going on today because of it? I’ve decided to make deviled eggs in protest of their chaos and have also bought candy skulls to eat.

November 18, 2002

Apparently, there is an Occult Day(?) and Sam insists we spend the day researching cults. Tucker has found a tech cult online that says there is “Techno Magic” and he is now trying to learn it. Sam has found a book of curses and has been giggling since she found it. Sam giggling is terrifying. I am concerned.

November 28, 2002

The turkey came to life and attacked us. Mom and Dad are blaming ghosts but me and Jazz agree that this is totally their fault for putting the stupid ecto in the fridge. At least the rest of the food was edible. I mean. It had a kinda glowing but I haven’t gotten sick yet. So yay?

November 29, 2002

So the food wasn’t good and I ended up getting sick this morning. fml Jazz is mad that I ate some of it. I am fully aware of what food safety is Jazz. But I was hungry and after the turkey, I was just tired and hangry. I had no clue you had ordered pizza so :p

December 5, 2002

On the 5th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me! Nothing because my family is insane. Mom and Dad are already starting their yearly Santa argument. Sam and Tuck are both out of town to visit family for the holidays, Jazz is avoiding the house because it’s “disruptive to my mental development” and I’m grounded for yelling at Dad when he burst into my room and accidentally made my little Rover fall off the shelf and brake.

December 9, 2002

Mom and Dad’s insanity is ramping up. They almost never leave the lab now and whenever I try to bring food down to them they either just mumble and keep working or start arguing again. The whole in the wall has a frame now too.

December 24, 2002

I made a mistake when I brought Mom and Dad their dinner today. In my defense, I was just tired of them yelling about Santa. So I asked why they had hazmat suits but me and Jazz didn’t if ecto was so dangerous. Because if it’s that dangerous then the fact we have ecto in the fridge means that we should all have suits. Jazz is furious with me cause now our parents are making us try on our new suits tomorrow. I am terrified of whatever monstrosity they create no matter how “fashionable” Dad claims they will be.

December 25, 2002

It’s worse than I thought. Mine’s white.

January 15, 2003

Gods, I hate this. I’ve been sick for the past week and Jazz says we’re almost out of soup. I keep going back and forth between being hungry and puking up whatever Jazz feeds me. Mom says that she has some tea that may help but when Dad brought it up it tasted funny. It did make me feel a little better but it just had a really weird taste. Dad said it’s just because I’m sick so everything tastes funny right now.

January 19, 2003

Is it weird that I want to lick the ecto in the fridge? I’m pretty sure it is but it still kinda looks lickable to me. Like how you know that D batteries are not edible but almost everyone has licked one at some point?

Jazz just gave me a lecture about putting things in my mouth that I shouldn’t… Again…

January 27, 2003

Jazz scared me this morning. I walked into the kitchen this morning and just saw glowing eyes. Like a cat’s eyes in the dark. Jazz thinks I’m hallucinating from lack of sleep because of the all-nighter I pulled with Tuck trying to pass the next level on DOOM but I swear that her eyes were glowing.

February 9, 2003

I’m starting to worry. I know they're obsessed with their dumb portal but they haven’t eaten in 2 days. Jazz is planning on going down there and persuading (yelling at them) them to eat if they don’t come up for dinner tonight.

February 12, 2003

Happy Birthday to me. I am now 14 years old. Mom and Dad forgot it was my birthday again. They ran into the kitchen this morning because they completed their portal. They even dragged me and Jazz down into the lab to see them turn it on before we went to school. It didn’t work and now Mom and Dad are going to take a drive around town to clear their heads. They probably won’t be back until dinner time. Sam and Tucker are coming over after school though so at least it will be quiet while they are over. And I think Jazz is going to make a cake if the box of mix I saw her trying to hide from me yesterday is any indication. 

[illegiblewords]

SOME ILLEGIBLE RAMBLES AND REFLECTIONS: GALE AND WYLL AS FORSAKEN CHILDREN

Gale and Wyll share a rather unique element of abuse that I haven't seen discussed yet. Someone's gotta talk about it, might as well be me lol.

I would argue that both Wyll and Gale are being pressured to destroy themselves at the altar of certainty. Wyll pacted with Mizora in the first place because when the cult of Tiamat threatened Baldur's Gate, he was told that destruction and death were inevitable outcomes unless he agreed. Mizora was exploiting fear, self-doubt, and a double-standard in self-worth. Even in the Forgotten Realms I'm pretty sure the future isn't set in stone. There was a definite chance destruction and death could occur due to the cult of Tiamat though, and Wyll was willing to enter an incredibly abusive pact to avoid that possibility. His alternative was to accept that life is struggle and uncertainty by nature, and he does not have total control over outcomes. The idea that his best might not be good enough and others might come to harm was enough to justify self-destruction in Wyll's own mind back then. In scenarios where Wyll ends his pact, it's narratively poetic that Mizora poses the same question. This is a way for audiences to examine whether or not Wyll has changed over the course of his pact, whether he looks at himself and life the way he did originally. Mizora tells him with the same false-pretense of certainty that if he doesn't use her power then his father will die and it will be Wyll's fault for not sacrificing himself in Ulder's name. Having Wyll break the pact feels appropriate to me. Whether he succeeds or fails in saving Ulder, it matters that he makes the attempt as a free man without any guaranteed outcome. If he succeeds, it's an especially good way to spit in the face of Mizora's manipulation. She never knew for sure what tomorrow would bring. She had no right to pretend that she did. Mystra does a similar thing to Gale. Gale might succeed in destroying the Absolute without detonating the orb. He might succeed in retrieving the Crown of Karsus. He might not. Mystra isn't in it for mortals here either way. She wants what she wants for herself when she wants it. And while the scene before the final battle varies depending on choices, I had one where Gale basically started panicking because if he didn't use the orb and the group's efforts failed--he thought that everyone who died to the Absolute and mindflayers would be because of him. He thought it would be cowardice and selfishness not to kill himself. He could have gone up alone, detonated the orb alone, and made CERTAIN nobody died except for him. The alternative was to risk failure for the possibility that he wouldn't need to die too. Like Wyll, Gale was taught not to trust himself. Like Wyll, Gale believes his life and well-being are acceptable prices for 'the greater good'. Like Wyll, Gale is being told that the fault of everyone's suffering if he tries and fails is not the Absolute, not the Emperor, not the Dead Three--but him. His best couldn't overpower those enemies, so it's his fault for letting everyone down. It's his fault for not just killing himself. For Wyll it isn't Mizora's fault if his father dies. It isn't Gortash's faut. Blame falls on him exclusively because he wasn't ready to put himself back into the power of an abuser. The attempt to shift accountability is incredibly dishonest. Both Wyll and Gale are basically being put into the allegory of the foresaken child. For anyone who may not know it, the story goes like this.

There is a perfect, utopian city. No one suffers, no one fights, no disease ravages its streets, no hunger grips its people. And everyone not only lives in peace, but lives in the certainty that their peace will never be broken. There is, however, a price to this. For all the residents of that city to enjoy tranquility a single, innocent child must be sacrificed to endure unimaginable torture. It's because of this child's suffering that everyone else is guaranteed happiness. Is that child's life an acceptable price?

Most people would say it isn't. The allegory exists to illustrate how people might decide to give cruelty and horror a pass.

There is another saying that exists, too. "Those who would sacrifice freedom for security deserve neither." That is also what is being demanded of Wyll and Gale--their freedom, their agency, their efforts rejected as inadequate. Only guaranteed outcomes will do according to their abusers... except life has no guarantees.

I would argue Wyll and Gale are both effectively forsaken children, who are being blamed for balking when told to accept their torment for the good of everyone else. Their abusers condemn them for not treating themselves as expendable.

There's a difference between a sacrifice freely made as a last resort when all alternatives are exhausted, and someone making a sacrifice because they regard their own life as cheap or are afraid of failure as a possibility. There's also a huge difference when someone sacrifices themself as their own idea compared to being coerced or manipulated into it. And as a fun personal experience that accidentally illustrated the point. During my first complete play through, it happened that there were two characters in-range of the Netherbrain. One was Karlach, wailing on the thing until it had about twenty HP left. The other was Gale. Gale had no powerful spells left, and no scrolls left. But he had cantrips and he was in-range. The last move in that fight was Gale killing the Netherbrain with shocking grasp. Considering that Gale started the game with basically none of his archwizard spells, that Mystra had no trust in his capabilities and encouraged him to doubt his own capabilities, that Mystra wanted him to kill himself regardless of whether it was necessary simply because it was certain... having Gale win on the reaction cantrip felt like the biggest fuck you he could have given. Could not have asked for things to unfold better than that personally. In any case the idea that Wyll and Gale come to realize they're more capable than they ever gave themselves credit, that they aren't disposable, and that they aren't to blame for the bad actions of other people seems like a key lesson for both of them imo.

[incesthemes]

I'm coming to bother you even though you're asleep because your sad long dead gay arctic explorers are haunting me so you have to deal with the consequences of your actions by me asking you to talk.

I'm curious to know your thoughts on Tuunbaq. How well you think he worked as a plot device in general in the amc, whether the book portrayed it in any different ways (I believe you said you read the book, might be wrong, ignore this if you had), anything interesting you've happened to read about it through your other research into the sad dead tent men, whether you really really fucking hated the cgi, etc.

I'll be back to haunt you with questions about Jopson but right now my brain is just record scratch sounds and sobbing so you're gonna have to wait for something coherent to come out of that mess lol

i am AWAKE now and i gotta say i wasn't expecting the jopson talk last night to lead into tuunbaq but that's okay. he's my perfect fluffy wuffy teddy bear who can do no wrong

i think others have said this kinda thing better than i ever could, but i really do like how tuunbaq is used in the show. he's like a manifestation of colonial hubris—the embodiment of fuck around and find out. they came to the arctic and destroyed the ecosystem, and their imperialist entitlement to conquer the land was inevitably their downfall. and i like that it's the "land" itself (in a metaphorical way, through tuunbaq) that shows them that entitlement is nothing but a false, vain hope. it doesn't matter what you think you're owed; the world doesn't exist for you to exploit and command, and it will not bend to your will.

because like, if gore and bryant had hesitated before shooting the shaman, tuunbaq likely would never have been a problem for them, right? he certainly wasn't in the 8 months since they'd gotten stuck in the pack. had they been peaceful and had they respected the land and its people, nature never would have clapped back. it was retaliation and defense. and the explorers' escalation of the issue—trying to hunt the bear, again out of entitlement to conquer and dominate—only caused further harm. they paid the ultimate price because they couldn't let go of their own entitlement and imperialism. they refused to listen to the netsilik, they pursued vengeance and sought dominion, and they died.

(i think about that inuit account a lot where it was said that the netsilik provided a group of starving men with an igloo and seals to eat, and they came back months later to discover the seals untouched and the men consumed. that they chose cannibalism over adaption to the local food sources is a horror in itself and an exemplar of the hubris these men carried with them—while the show depicts them as more sympathetic to the netsilik (really hard to get worse than this real account, no matter how hostile the show characters are), i think it does a good job of presenting the mindset of the real expedition)

i haven't read the book though, and based on the reviews i've seen of it i don't have much motivation to either. i may end up reading it in the future but i don't currently have plans for it. as for the tuunbaq himself, i don't think much(?) of him was actually cgi! he has a whole uhhhhh like. i don't know the word or i've forgotten what it is. but he's real:

i don't know much about his production though, and i actually thought he was cgi too until i saw this picture!!! the actual cgi from what i've seen of it (i haven't had much of a chance to look at the BTS stuff tbh...) is really well done. i didn't even realize they weren't like, submerging these poor actors in frozen water until i saw the greenscreen 😭

for tuunbaq's design, i don't know. i've become endeared to his weird human face, but i prefer the Long Neck version which is apparently the book description of him. i just think it's crazy and kooky, and the fanart i've seen of the book tuunbaq is just so awesome. sufficiently creepy for a "monster" but also extremely compelling.

anyway i love tuunbaq. he's the chilling manifestation of colonial hubris. he's blanky's wife. he's my good buddy and best friend. i'm his biggest fan forever 💖

[fifthrideroftheapocalypse]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

thanks for the tag @lemonlyman-dotcom !!

1. How many works do you have an AO3? 19

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 29,507

3. What fandoms do you write for? 911 Lone Star, 911, The Old Guard, Shadowhunters, RWRB

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

victories, defined | a 911 Season 7 coda to the medal ceremony. Tommy confronts Gerrard (i dont really like this one tbh)

hitchcokian | a 911 season 7 coda. buck calls Tommy right after he runs into Kim. (this one is okay, but i fear i wasted the title "hitchcockian" on this when it would be cool do a genre-bending thing. idk)

echoes | 911 Lone Star Season 1. Carlos waits in the hospital after TK is shot and really talks to the 126 for the first time.

why | 911 Lone Star. the silliest thing i've ever written, and it's all @lemonlyman-dotcom's fault. Carlos buys Lou II pajamas and then realizes he has to put the pajamas ... on Lou II and regrets every decision that led him there.

halted beginnings | 911 Lone Star. post-engagement. Carlos is in love. But he's forgotten about something.

5. Do you respond to comments? I do, although I think im kinda behind on doing so? I do forget to sometimes.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? i think it's a tie between halted beginnings (linked above) and fundamental. they are essentially sister stories, with fundamental being the meta-verison of halted beginnings. they both tackle Carlos forgetting about Iris when he says yes to TK's proposal. halted beginnings is more of a character introspection into how, in the moment, Carlos might have forgotten about Iris. fundamental takes the meta-approach that Carlos/Iris were never planned from the beginning and is written as if Carlos, the character from season 1-3, knows someone else is rewriting his history (the writer, or "Tim," as I called him in the annotations lol). Both fics end on a heavy note, with Carlos either putting off telling TK (halted beginnings) or a rewritten version of Carlos taking over Seasons 1-3 Carlos (fundamental).

7. What is the fic your wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably "why" (linked above). TK and Lou II in matching pajamas ... couldn't be better!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't, and I hope it stays that way.

9. Do you write smut? not really

10. Do you write crossovers? No, but I would like to

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? no. but open to that if anyone wanted to translate

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nooooooo, but I would love to collaborate on something!!!! Idk how to find a person to collaborate with though lol

16. What are your writing strengths? i really don't know ... someone else tell me. i feel like i always want to make people feel like they are in the room with the character, and i thiiiiiink i do that. or at least im getting better at it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? plotting, finishing wips lol

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I don't do it, but I definitely could be better at adding in there.

19. First fandom you wrote for? for this question I'll take into account my past fan fic writing life, which was a long time ago. Angel

20. Favorite fics you've written?

In no particular order:

large popcorn with a bag of m&ms | an Old Guard fic I wrote in 2021 that I really want to turn into a longer series. It's Nile-centric and about how she misses her real family while adjusting to her new immortal life.

peace | a 911 Lone Star fic that is actually pretty angsty too, haha. it's very short, but I was stretching some more poetic writing muscles I hadnt used in a long time. This is Carlos, after the breakup

Staring at ghosts | my newest one, 911, bucktommy. It's a wip, but I really love the first chapter, and I'm really excited about the rest of it I have outlined and partly written. Buck and Tommy are still in the fairly early stages of their relationship, and Buck doesn't really know how to open up when he starts having dreams about the lightning strike.

--

no pressure tagging: @rmd-writes @welcometololaland @reyesstrand @bonheur-cafe @paperstorm

@alrightbuckaroo @carlos-tk @carlos-in-glasses

[beeseverywhen]

The site manager (volunteer lackey for landlord) (usually acts like he hates me tho I strongly suspect he doesn't and has no idea that he rubs everyone up the wrong way.) came to talk to me (even tho I'd done a circuit of the nearby park after I saw him at the gate when I arrived). I'd successfully avoided him for over 6 months so was gonna happen eventually I guess lol. And he was surprisingly nice! He was still passive aggressive and kinda rude but he was only at the level he shows to everyone else and had left off the extra level he usually reserves for me.(He's harsh to everyone but usually has a special axe to grind where I'm involved.) He didn't even threaten to evict me! Just kept congratulating me on 'finally doing what needs to be done.' He did tell me about all the other ppl he's intending to evict which I suspect was an attempt to remind me that eviction is always on the table but hey! No direct threat!

Him being so nice kinda gave me whiplash tbh. First of all he's let me avoid him for months which??? Suspicious. And now he's being all nice???

Ugh very possibly overdid it at the garden today and concerned about the energy payback next week. But!!! Made massive progress in the war against the veg patch returning to grassland. Managed to water as well so hoping next batch of strawberries might be a bit healthier (at first they were the usual size but tasted pretty bland but recently they have been growing absolutely miniature and lumpy. I strongly suspect its cause they are dehydrated cause we've had no rain!!! and I've been too tired to water them at all (any watering I do manage has been going on the establishing plants and those that won't grow at all without it))

I've got celery, squashes, corn and beets all doing well and tomatoes, cucumber, celery and kohl rabi doing less well, but yes! Hopefully some will survive till harvest. No strawberries to pick this time (I didn't look tbh. They are overwhelming me lol) but loads of raspberries! They are strangely thriving this year. And I've got multiple varieties doing well (3 different colours!!!)

Thyme and rosemary are doing very well too

Flowers pretty much all died this year but there's a few that have come up themselves in the beds

[eraserisms]

Your portrayal sticks out because it represents the only time I've ever fallen in love with a fandom just because of 1 RPer, never mind that I agreed to RP with you on this account despite my usual apprehensions about interacting with fandoms I don't know. I trusted you & I'm glad I did. You're so patient yet passionate when it comes to summarizing scenes of the show & relationships between characters--but that's over IMs, OOC. (Yes, everyone, the mun is kind & funny, in addition to be being a great RPer.) ANYWAY!

Shota's 1 of my favorite characters to interact with on here. I don't have it in me to go read or watch all of MHA, but I'm always finding myself asking questions about Shota or wondering what he'd do in ___ situation. & you know his voice, so you know the answer. & then there's all the work you put into developing parts of him that aren't canonically talked about. This is what the writing part of fandom is meant for. I don't know if you write fanfics, but they'd be enjoyable as fuck. I love reading your metas & HCs for Shota, no matter how long, because I CRAVE THE INFORMATION!! Also he's my dad (lol).

TL;DR - you're my only Shota & I love the effort you put into your portrayal. Thanks for introducing Kylie to his first boyfriend.

In reference to this post

You're so sweet. I am so glad that you gave me and Shota a chance! I have to say though, I feel the same way about the characters that you write. I honestly had forgotten how much I enjoyed X-men and Marvel things and didn't plan on doing too much interaction with those fandoms despite BNHA being a superhero based fandom. Thank you for reminding me, truly.

Also I am always ecstatic to answer any questions that you have about the fandom and storyline-esque things. Your active interest in something that you are unfamiliar with is really flattering within itself. I feel that you've also been so incredibly patient with me as far as explaining things goes because I have forgotten so much about those fandoms. Also the only comics I've ever really read as far as Marvel goes have been The Incredible Hulk, Captain America & Hawkeye. So, you filling me in on stuff I don't know about has been incredibly helpful especially considering that so many other Marvel RPers have reached out to me here.

I haven't written any MHA fanfictions yet but maybe sometime in the future. If I were to do anything like that , it would likely be some sort of one shot because I'm terrible at writing them to be honest. I think that's why I end up writing a lot of long-winded headcanons/metas here instead. & Shota is more than willing to 'dad' you any day of the week, being a dad is one of his many talents.

P.S. - I do a lot of shippy things with the person who introduced me to Shota who also plays All-Might. I actually made this blog with the intention of building familial/platonic & student/teacher relationships with Shota. Also given Shota's asocial nature, I didn't think that I'd be writing too many romantic relationships for him. But, given that we had written with each other in the past I was more open to the idea of shipping with you in general. & I have to say; I am happy to have started shipping Kylie with Shota. I feel that they compliment each other so well.

[miserywizard]

genderfucked lesbians 🤝🏻🤝🏻🤝🏻 RADIVOJE THAT WAS HIS NAME YES THANKS why do i miss a character ive never had the pleasure of knowing idek and i get it! whatever you decide to do will be the right decision ofc and if you end up making edits to publish it (important edits aside it DID always feel more adult than ya to me but maybe that was wishful thinking) i promise there Will be people who want nothing more than to read abt your silly horrid children! also. also idk if this is of any comfort but people have not forgotten your books and i say this in the non scary way i promise like. im a librarian AND bookseller in the buttcrack of south italy and we're currently reading book 3 in the weekly book club! not everyone on earth was on the hell app at that time and most people understand that a fumble is just a fumble, nothing to be witch hunted for! tbh That whole thing was nightmarish (and confusing!) to witness from the outside so i can't even imagine what recovering from it is like but i genuinely wish you only the best and a very do nooot get a v public full name and everything twitter acc ever again (AND if you're absolutely done talking abt this stuff feel absolutely free to just. Close ur eyes and pretend i didn't send anything at all dhskfj i didn't even follow you here to avoid making u feel weird i would hate to accidentally be the one clown who turns the attention on The Mess rather than your new bunch of lesbians which btw. love them deeply already thank you)

he was such a funky little guy he's some of my finest work. I went 'what if I smush Vax!Critical Role into Palamedes!Locked Tomb what happens' and what happens is: the worst most pedantic boy alive.

lol i mean the entire basis of the book was every bonkers decision he makes comes from his genuine and real fear that Someone Is Going to Literally Eat Him so it's probably adult. Idk i reread blessed monsters for the first time since 2021 at the beginning of the year and went 'oh we were very generous calling this book YA...'

that is. genuinely so very very sweet thank you <3

LOL i haven't logged into my twitter since 2021 i anticipate it will get deleted for inactivity someday and the impulse to make an account on any new twitter-like only comes from a place of missing friends that are mostly long gone and probably wouldn't interact with me in public anyway. so! i doubt i'll be anywhere than here and instagram, honestly.

i'm far more comfortable talking about it now. At this point it feels... silly? I did what I could, regardless of the fact that it feels like I did literally everything wrong in the moment. If people who were not involved are still mad about it, then, why do you care so much? If people who were involved are still mad that's fine and reasonable, though, again, a little silly.*

i love my lesbians very much hope i get to publish the books with my lesbians.

[theartisticcrow]

Silly Game Time: If you were to become the patron deity of one specific aspect of the *natural* world, which aspect would you choose?

It could be as wide as the sky or as narrow as tide pools, as universal as clouds or as localized as one mountain, as alive as animals or as inanimate as rocks. All that matters is that it's of nature and that it feels right for you.

(Personally, I would chose to be the god of dusk, when the sun sets and day fades from the sky to give way to night's gentler moon and stars.)

I think I would be the deity of the northern lights, providing a bit of hope and joy in a part of the world so cold, so barren.

And if I were to be a deity of just anything, I think I would have something to do with knowledge or the correction of misinformation and injustice. Or perhaps I would have something to do with revolution, seeing as the French Revolution is something I take a large interest in and I did spend 11 days writing a 30 page essay about Maximilien Robespierre, explaining why he was not a dictator and why people think that (reactionary propaganda, mostly).

I am tired and feeling a little depressed with the current state of the world right now. Usually I'm optimistic and hopeful (what else can I do in my current position?) and I am quick to correct the idiocy of other people who think murdering innocent people in somehow justified (yes, I have had to deal with this. My strong sense of social justice that came free with the autism doesn't allow me to let it slide [lol that's pretty much how Robespierre died])... But today I just feel a bit sad. Thus why I'm answering this ask even though it is from so long ago. I think I meant to answer it but I forgot.

Of course, I did see a play literally about the holocaust earlier today, so it shouldn't be surprising that it had some effect on me. It was really well down and honestly had me close to tears at a couple points throughout the performance, which is saying something because I don't get that kind of emotional very easily.

If I could be a deity of anything, I think I'd like to be a deity of Hope.

But on a more positive and amusing side of things, look what I happened upon in the lighting booth today

Saw the little Robespierre cut out yesterday and couldn't help myself. Funniest thing is that I am factually correct, it's hardly even a joke at this point.

All that said and done, I'm probably going to lie down now. Hey, at least I have Friday off tomorrow so I finally get to take a break for the first time in over a week. I've got everything together for my best friend's birthday "party" on Saturday. It'll just be us too, he doesn't have any other close friends (his school kind of sucks and people suck). Plan I think is that we'll go bowling then head back to his place. He hates his birthday yet refuses to tell me why, but I'm determined to make it fun. I have an entire wooden chest full of gifts, plus a Bill Cipher poster that I created, since of course he's a big Gravity Falls fan and kind of turned me into on too.

I also am going to give him a few of my rubber rats, a nice cloak that I spent three days fixing up, a harmonica I found in my closet, some other random things including a traffic cone that I painstakingly managed to fit inside the box, and the Book of Bill, which I know he will be delighted to see. I'm not too worried about him seeing this despite him technically having a tumblr account. I think he's already forgotten about it anyways, so...

And then I've got some government exam or whatever on Monday that I'm required to complete if I want to ever graduate high school, but I'm not too worried about it. I am however super excited for November because my Drama teacher is offering to take anyone from my Drama class who's interested to go see a production of the Sweeney Todd musical, so I'll be seeing that next month.

Haven't really got much else going on aside from schoolwork and a slideshow presentation that I'm working on as a science project and already I have failed to take it seriously. The first slide starts out with the caption: ASTRONOMY TIMELINE "What's the worst that could happen" and then the next slide is the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs, and then one of the dinosaurs in the image is saying "yeah, I'm sure that's edible" which becomes their last words on a gravestone, so you know this is going to be a good presentation.

Also here's a photo I took of a pigeon while I was in Toronto last weekend.

Sorry but also not sorry if this comes off as weird in any way whatsoever. I've gone completely off topic in regards to the original question but honestly it's just a nice excuse to off about my life because writing my thoughts down always makes me feel better.

If you see this and take the time to read this through, I hope you're doing well and that you're safe and comfortable and I hope that you never have to worry about any terrible things because the world is a terrifying place. I hope you have a good day or night. I hope you're okay and you make sure to take care of yourself. I would be deeply saddened to hear if anything bad happened to you, even despite the fact that I hardly know you.

We're all just people trying to survive and make it through another day. We all have our own concerns and internal conflicts. We all possess our own feelings, whether others realise it or not. I don't care if I hardly know you, I still hope that you feel loved and appreciated.

[shxyne-ily]

IM BACKK !!

OMG OMGOMG HI YALL I THOUGHT THAT I WOULD NEVER SEE THIS ACCOUNT OR POST ON THIS EVER AGAIN BUT I FINALLY GOT ACCESS TO IT ( i forgot my password and i got a new phone and i guess it didn't save the login lol ) BUT IM BACK YAYAYAYAY!! its been crazy in the smosh fandom and in my life since i last updated lol, but my love and passion for the smosh fandom is still here ! so im not abandoning the fandom (still a nerd for them lol ) hopefully yall haven't forgotten about me. trust me i have been trying to get back into this account ever since I've lost access to it. anyways wanted to update you guys hopefully yall will stick around for my comeback lol, alright that's all i wanted to say :) missed this account and the tumblr smosh community very much :) 💖

[gaykey]

I’m the shawol-somsom anon… you’re right LMAO I probably came off a little too strong and made assumptions about you. I’m on vacation and have too much free time for my own good, I’m sorry about that. Btw It doesn’t bother me that you specifically stopped supporting Key, I don’t know you and I barely use tumblr, but I remember you being one of the biggest lil freak/locket accounts on tumblr a few years ago (at least, that's how it seemed), so I got a little frustrated because I know how big accounts influence the perception of the rest of the fandom. 

But I’m not sorry about saying the whole thing feels hypocritical, I still think that. Because what I said is true, FK and Taemin are not better than Key (can’t speak on Jonghyun, Minho and Onew because I do think they try to be more sensible about social issues, and their responsibilities as idols); if I thought Key was horrible, then I’d think they’re horrible, too (disclaimer: I don’t think they are horrible). I simply don’t understand it, and you’re much older than me so it feels even more confusing how you can reconcile the idea. And I would like to have a conversation but tbh I’m a little scared to come off anon bc I don’t even know how tumblr works.

hello again.

it's cool, like, i get why you said what you said. i know i probably come across as very wishy-washy on here at times?

but in regards to key. i also don't think he (or taemin, or first or khao) is a horrible person. at all.

and i'm not saying that they haven't all done problematic stuff. i don't know for sure what fk have done or said, because i'll be so real, i haven't delved that deep. i'm just about below the surface level of being a somsom, but they're people like anyone else, so they've probably fucked up somewhere.

with key however, i was down deeeeep in that fandom lol. 16 years is a long time to be that fixated on a person. every little thing he did was on my tl and dash. maybe that's why his action in particular seem bigger to me?

and, the reason i chose to distance myself from being a lil freak particulalry, was because with key, it wasn't just a few minor instances, or little things that i could excuse so easily.

though i haven't forgotten, i forgave key & taemin for their coulourist remarks they made last year, because i felt that their apologies were genuine.

i acknowldeged shitty thing's key's done in the past, and gave him the benefit of the doubt. many times.

but truly, it felt like the past year? he's just been doing them over & over, unlike taemin, and first and khao. to my knowledge.

i can only forgive so much? and like, key is someone i did - and in many ways very much still do - admire and hold in high esteem (i know putting him on a pedestal is a ME problem, but i'm just being real about how i feel and perceived him) so, it HIT way harder.

i get why that comes across as hypocritcal - i do - but it doesn't feel like it is to me because of the continunity of his behaviour.

i don't know if you were here as i was making the decision to unstan, but it was tough. and i am older. i'm a grown ass woman, so it felt silly to be so emotional about the whole thing tbh.

also i don't want or mean to influence anyone's opinions, however i am starting to get that maybe i do in some way, because i was a pretty prominent key blog for a while???

which is why i try not to talk about him at all too much these days.

maybe i'll forgive him again, maybe he'll do something to redeem himself to me??? idk!

and anon, fr, feel free to come and talk in dms or even send me a message here off anon if you wat to talk. i promise i'm nice, and i'll keep it private if you din't want people to know your blog.

no worries either way xx

[alteredsilicone]

With Jade's release I decided to update my personal tier list-

Jade is an easy favorite, her playstyle matches what I like, maybe a bit more on the DPS side unlike Citrine/Nezha (my go-to favs), but hey Dante is there as well-

Also I shuffled some frames around and added a new tier:

Chroma, Valkyr and Mirage got put in the new tier since they're "old loves" I played mid game but have phased out for other frames.

Shuffled some out of the "like" into "know how to play" category - these two are similar on account that if I like how a frame plays, I am more likely to invest (duh), but there are some frames I can pick but I would do that only if I was "forced" to aka EDA (this was prompted by me trying Dagath, realizing she's good but not really Feeling her playstyle in the fun department).

Also I moved some down to the "no strong opinion"/"don't play much" from "know how to play" because it's been too long and I've forgotten lol, I would probably fumble Voruna if I tried her now. That said, that is the secondary feature of the "know how to play" tier - a frame can slide down into "don't play as much" if I feel like I haven't touched the build in a while and it might be outdated in regards to newer content.

*cries in putting 8 forma in frames trying to update their builds*

Ps. "You aren't allowed to have multiple favorites! Pick a main RIGHT NYEOW!" NOOOOOOOO I legit can't choose between Nezha and Citrine. Gun to my head I will choose Nezha because I've had him for longer and he carried me through early/mid game and I farmed his prime day one in like 2 hours and then rushed him. <3 Love my silly slidey boy.

[jeanharlowseyebrows]

twenty questions for fic writers

tagged by @raylangivins, thank you!!! i've never done one of these and it was fun to think about.

How many works do you have on ao3? so i've actually had like. a lot of ao3 accounts. some of which are still around and some that i have sent on to greener pastures. my 1d fic is #gone but not forgotten <3. for simplicity's sake i'm just going to do my current ao3 account even though all of the works on it are very Indie and Niche and therefore not super widely read. all that being said: 9.

What’s your total ao3 word count? 38,034

What fandoms do you write for? i'm not really like a super single fandom driven writer, if that makes sense. i don't tend to write and write and write continuously for the same fandom. like traditionally i will have one (1) idea per fandom and once it happens then it's done. i've written more yellowjackets fic than any other fandom, but i think that's because there are so many characters and i can muster one fucked up little scenario for each of them. also there are far more fandoms represented in my google docs than what i've published on ao3.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? well. taking into consideration that i don’t really have many kudos on any of my stories (again. niche. indie.), these are the top 5:

something holy (the borgias) soft as cotton, tender as kiss (the haunting of hill house) at every mouth his teeth a sinner champ’d (yellowjackets) princess diana (yellowjackets) the scaffolding of the human body (yellowjackets)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? i always try to! for one, i don't really get that many, so it's easy to reply, and i do really like talking about writing and hearing what people liked, what they didn't like, etc. one of my favorite things to do as a reader is to leave long as shit wordy ass comments on stories i've really enjoyed and i really enjoy when people do that for my stories too. it's just cool to hear what stood out to someone, what they really enjoyed, what they felt. it's rewarding to get feedback and i don't want someone to feel like they've left me a comment and i've ignored them.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ummmmmmm i would say most of them lean towards angsty/bittersweet? love with claws and teeth (yellowjackets) is probably the most angsty lol sorry taissa turner </3

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? again none of them are really… like… overjoyed. one might be tricked by something holy but in my mind, what lurks around the corner for them is Not Good and therefore the ending is not necessarily NOT happy but that's only because they haven't gotten to the unhappiness yet.

Do you get hate on fics? i haven’t yet but it would certainly be intriguing interesting and compelling if i did.

Do you write smut? rarely. like i try but it’s not my strong suit so i don't do it very often. also i wouldn't say the majority of my fic like. needs it? i'm not typically writing the kind of fic where one might expect explicit sex.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? i write crossovers in my mind and nowhere else. actually i did publish a crossover as a kid on ff dot net and it was stand by me/the outsiders and i specifically remember a scene taking place in a junkyard and people jumping off the tops of junked cars. so obviously it was very normal and good.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? i don’t think so but who knows. the internet is a vast place.

Have you ever had a fic translated? i don’t think so! but it would be fun if i did!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? not really, i don't think i would be very good at it. i am far too attached to the sound of my own voice and also i'm bossy and particular

What’s your all-time favorite ship? this is just too difficult of a question. i've read sooooooooo many ships across soooooooooo many fandoms. like i'll literally read anything i'm not picky. probably my most frequently read ships are like the big standards - deancas, stevebucky, etc. - but that's just because they're very available.

What’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? realistically most of them. i finish maaaaaaaaybe 10% of the things I start.

What are your writing strengths? i really enjoy my own close third person narration lmao. also i think i’m good at like taking little details and creating a scene. otherwise known as imagery (#writing)

What are your writing weaknesses? cannot for the life of me come up with a plot ever

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? it's not something that's necessarily come up for me but if i did it, i would want to know someone who spoke whatever language it was who could help me make it seem very natural and well-placed. i would be extremely reluctant to try like a google translate type thing.

First fandom you wrote for? 1986 classic stand by me, which i just went to my old fanfic dot net account to double check. published in 2006 lmfao

Favorite fic you’ve written? i don’t know if it’s my favorite but i think devotional was kind of a departure for me and maybe stands out for that reason. i still really like the writing style. it’s more sparse than i usually tend towards and also written in present tense, which isn't usual for me. i just think it’s kind of evocative and lyrical and nice and it'd be fun if more people read it lmao

tagging @elliecreed @haniawritesthings @chasingfictions @r-osehips

[feuqueerfire]

Utsukushii Kare (S1, S2, Movie) Live Blogging

I can't believe I'm finally, finally, finally getting around to watching Season 2 and the movie (+ rewatching season 1).

I knew I liked this show well enough and the characters have stayed with me since watching it in 2022 but I didn't realize that Utsukushii Kare is pretty special because it's actually the very first live blogging post I did on this blog. It was February 2022 and now it's 2+ years later March 2024. Before then, I'd maybe tweet a thread of me watching but the tweets would be sparse because I didn't wanna spam people. I think I got the idea because I was writing so many Bad Buddy thoughts (also in Jan-Feb 2022) on my show tracking spreadsheet and that wasn't sustainable lol

Anyway, looking at these is making me remember that I'd been looking forward to season 2 from when I finished watching (from my live blogging ending thoughts) and had anticipated the release of it for months and months. Even more ridiculously, in my show tracking spreadsheet, the only thing I wrote for this show was a link to my live blogging and "If there was a sequel, I'd watch" bruh that's all I had to say and yet I'm finally watching the sequel 2 years later (while the sequel has been out for a year).

Anyway, enough chatter, I think I'm just delaying watching this show because I like season 1 and the characters so much and I'm just... nervous about my expectations.

Utsukushii Kare: Season 1

Probably won't be writing much because I already did the whole live blogging for this.

Also, it's weird that I haven't rewatched this? Why do I remember it so vividly if I haven't rewatched? I occasionally watch a bunch of tiktoks for the show and sometimes people mention it in podcasts, so maybe that's why? I was thinking maybe I'd watched reaction videos but nah, apparently I'd only watched that for 1 account back in April 2022. Once again, I continue to ramble instead of pressing play

Ep 1 (Mar 23)

Watched like 12 minutes before falling asleep

Ah, the fondness is coming back

Ep 2 (Mar 23)

Oh, the group going to Hira's house and the bike riding scene is here? in my head it was later

And the bike riding continues to be an incredible scene

Ep 3 (Apr 17)

Uhhh, I'm back after almost a month lol I think I wanted something much easier without complex dynamics at the time, so I'd watched Destiny Seeker instead

Oh, I'd forgotten about this tense scene after the contest

ahh the masturbation thing lolol

It bothers me that Kiyoi was nice again to those bully boys like why make good with them again? And when you're graduating no less?

that sudden kiss + pushing him hard enough that he falls to the ground + saying "see you again" before leaving really is just terrible and confusing lol

Ah, Hira really was always putting himself down and putting Kiyoi in a pedastal in these episodes + I remembered when somebody pointed out that in Hira's POV, there are many shots where Kiyoi is on elevated ground or taller/higher than Hira, so I noticed a lot of that in this ep

Ep 4 (Apr 17)

ack, the immediate 'stalker' to someone who ppl think is his fan is so T.T

"I want to kneel down at your feet right now" kills me every time

Koyoi's inability to communicate and Hira's idealized view of him are both so just . insane

ahh Kiyoi's POV from next ep

the episode starting with Hira saying "For several insipid years, all I did was grow up." while Kiyoi ends the episode with the same sentence

Ep 5 (Apr 17)

seeing Kiyoi lose his mind over Hira is so cathartic

ough, i forgot this hug that Kiyoi sees

I disliked the other guy more when I first watched it than I do now

Ep 6 (Apr 18)

Oops, went almost the whole day without watching anything

finger sucking scene

Ouch

the conversation at the school is just so good man, like ouch but hopeful

hehe cute biking

Overall:

Ahh, idek why I wasn't Gripped by this rewatch, like I like the characters and dynamics but it wasn't keeping my attention as much, maybe because it's a rewatch? Maybe my original rating of 6.5 was correct and I shouldn't have bumped it up to 7 but who knows, maybe I'll be reintroduced to the brainworms after watching Season 2 because I found ep 6 really engaging and was into it and S2 + movie will have new, unfamiliar stories for me.

Season 2

Ep 1 (Apr 18)

How soon after S1 is this season starting?

akkkk "Are you angry?" "Why?" "Last night I was too persistent" alkdjfasd;lkf

It's weird to realize that like... I'm older than them. I was several years older than them when they were in high school and now I'm probably 1-2 years older than them because Hira said graduation is approaching but it's weird still idk

not Mr. Suspicious lmfaoo

Hira kneeling and crawling around really is just a lot

it's so funny how Hira trembles in Kiyoi's presence because he's apparently standing too close, meanwhile we know for a fact that they canonically fuck

Hira's persistent fear that Kiyoi might die ?!

they're both so constipated in different ways, I'm dying like Hira's extreme lack of confidence about his looks and sense of self vs Kiyoi obviously being in love with him and wanting to reassure him but also not being able to compliment him truthfully and sincerely

Kiyoi's every sentence is a trap lmfao

omg I was so distracted by her, she's gorgeous and I love the outfit and jewelry

Kiyoi seething with jealousy ahh

lolol "today we're gonna do it"

oh my goddd what a good episode, I was giggling and dying and so engaged, I'm glad I love it so far because I was kinda nervous after not being as enamoured by S1

Ep 2 (Apr 19)

ah, i'm clutching my heart, flashback to the scene of when Hira taught Kiyoi about the tea olives or whatever and Kiyoi just desperately wanted Hira to say he likes him

return of Suspicious-kun plss

Is the other guy who's there for Anna gonna be significant? Either as an Anna s/o as well or as a Kiyoi hater maybe?

does Kiyoi want their love life to be more exciting?

aksldfj why are each of them so annoying like Koyoma's being like yeah Hira doesn't shut the fuck up about you and your drama at school while Kiyoi's like "Is Koyoma saying he sees a side of Hira I don't see? Is he trying to assert dominance?" like girl both hira and him are just dumbasses god bless

Koyoma on Kiyoi's ass for freeloading off of Hira and letting Hira do all the housework while he just pursues his acting or whatever ohh

pls Hira treating this shitty food as if it's from Olympus

Ah, Hira joining the photography competition at Kiyoi's encouragement (though the pressure would make me buckle)

Ep 3 (Apr 19)

Hira not making it to the next round of the competition but Kiyoi still being supportive, I needed to see this rn tbh

oh my god this is so sad man, they're literally always just on different lines of thinking because Kiyoi wants to be treated as an equal in the relationship while Hira thinks it would be an insult to think of himself as ever reaching Kiyoi's status

but it's so sad the way Kiyoi wants to obviously be known as Hira's bf (even though they can't) and the way he's hurting knowing that Hira wants Kiyoi and his parents to be completely separate owwww

omg? Hira saying I don't want to understand you? fucked up fr

Their relationship is often somewhat tragic because of their dynamic and how they see themselves and the fact that what they want from the relationship is different but this ep is so sad man

Ep 4 (Apr 19)

ah, good thing Kiyoi came back because they only have 1 episode of 23 mins left and i don't want the ending to be rushed lol

sorry accidentally got the ick when Kiyoi came and ordered Hira to get ginger ale in front of everybody even though ik it's like Dynamics but still why in front of dumbass bullies smhh

Hira not liking Kiyoi saying it's fine if he doesn't get a job after uni bc he can take care of them makes sense but then smiling happily when Kiyoi says "fine, then work like a workhorse and if you mess anything up for me I'll throw you away" is sooooo

huh? Why Hira didn't submit anything?

oh it's a different thing that Hira didn't submit for? Because he did indeed submit for the contest

woah, gasped at the fact that Hira is kneeling but at eye-level/slight higher than Kiyoi instead of lowering himself as much as possible

Hira being fed chocolate by Kiyoi, ah

great, delightful

Overall:

This season is about Hira and Kiyoi's relationship. They didn't become boring after getting together, they didn't magically end up being a perfect happy well-adjusted couple after getting together, nor were there random issues thrown just because; the struggles and hurdles are true to their characters and dynamics.

I was a bit afraid that I'd be meh about it because I was like fine but not Hooked on the S1 rewatch but the S2 was great, for real. I liked the themes and dynamics it explored and their character + relationship development and progression. I also smiled a lot and lost my mind a little at certain moments.

Strong writing, strong characters, strong acting, what a relief.

Rating: 7/10

Movie: Eternal

No clue what the movie is about actually, though there are a few gifsets/moments that I've seen that didn't appear in the series, so much be from here. + I saw one comment saying that Anna and Noguchi are supposed to be there more in the movie. oh also actually?? a kidnapping plot?? i heard it mentioned in a podcast i think

omg they're each recounting how they met the other to their own mentors

not the shrine ?!?! omg

I really don't know how to feel about Anna's fan like do we need to kill him or what?

what does Hira mean by him and Kiyoi drifting apart?

hah the divorce thing is here, I loved the gifset when I saw it and have had it in my likes for Months, gonna finally be able to reblog it

i think i saw a gifset or clip in this bathtub scene and I'm a great enjoyer of people discussing their desire for dubcon/cnc roleplay

Idk if I hate that I keep skipping all their makeouts/allusion to sex scenes like aghhh

I've also seen this part about hira apologizing for not having same free time as Kiyoi and Kiyoi grabbing his face in his hand to say stop apologizing, you've tried your best. i like it a lot

wait are Anna and Noguchi dating? I wanna know who the person Anna was talking about who has her heart but they can rarely meet because they're in the same industry. and it'd have the parallel of Hira wanting to photograph Kiyoi while Noguchi gets to photograph Anna

Noguchi used to be a scenario photographer?

ah, Hira didn't show up to the shoot with Noguchi and Kiyoi

pls why are they both obsessed with this award, he doesn't even have regular professional photography experience c'mon girls

oh, Anna's bf is some random actor from another company.

her fan is being... fine for now.

Aw, Anna

dang, they're bringing Anna to live with Hira's cousin

So does the aunt know that Hira and Kiyoi are like a thing or does she still think their fan/friend lol

Hira saying only Kiyoi is allowed to call him creepy and such because he's special + Kiyoi being like "he's creepy right?" Anna: "yeah" Kiyoi: Hey!

Ouch, yeah Hira saying he doesn't know what to shoot is crazy

Oof, Hira and Anna dating scandal

It must be so funny if you're watching this without knowing about EA celebrity dating culture (though even in SK, actors can date) and being like ? why is this a scandal ?

but i'm unexpectedly getting a celebrity-centric BL without seeking it out, which is great, esp bc when I seek it out I don't tend to find too many which actually give me what I want

random het sob story in the middle of my Utsukushii Kare but I like Anna so I'll allow it for like... 2 minutes

Ah, the kidnapping lol

oh it really is the Anna fan fuckhead aghhh how terrible, he's been off since the start

pls saviour Hira

Hira gets to photograph Kiyoi professionally yay

deciding to have one subject as your photo subject is crazy if you wanna be a professional but alright I'll buy into it

ah, conversation about beauty and age

gorgeous ending

Overall:

Great, fun, though not as emotionally invested as Season 2 because they're in a better place in their relationship in this movie (even if it's not necessarily Perfect). It was interesting to have new people in their lives like Anna and Noguchi and how their stories influenced them. I'm happy with where we're leaving off the characters after ~6h of show/movie.

Rating: 6.5/10

[seraphtrevs]

hey, i hope i found the right account

i read the inevitable on ao3 and i was wondering if you’re still updating it? i absolutely don’t mean to rush you or anything, i simply fell in love with the storyline and honestly your work in general. btw you got me researching quantum mechanics and oh my god thank you for that, shit’s interesting as fuck

This is the right account! Yes, I do plan on updating - I was sick for a while and took a lot of brain foggy medicines, but I'm back! I have about half of the next chapter of The Inevitable written, so hopefully I'll finish the rest by next week.

Thanks so much for reaching out! I always feel despondent when I haven't updated because I'm sure everyone will have forgotten about it by now so it's nice to hear that people are still reading! (And I'm glad I sent you on a quantum quest lol - it is really interesting!)

Here's a little preview:

Nacho was not sure what to do with himself. The luxury was fun, but he was getting bored. He returned to the kitchen to make some lunch. When he opened the door to the pantry, it turned out not to be a pantry after all. Instead, a staircase led downward to a door.

An ominous feeling crept over him—but why? It was just a basement. He was being ridiculous.

To prove to himself that he wasn’t ridiculous, he descended the stairs to the door, which was a dark, dull red, and the paint was peeling in places. In a house that was otherwise immaculate, the disrepair stood out. He put his hand on the tarnished doorknob and turned. At first, it stuck—Nacho felt a mix of relief and disappointment. But then there was a click, and the door creaked open.

It was pitch dark inside and cold enough to give him goosebumps. Nacho felt for a light switch and found one. He sucked in a breath as he flicked it on—and then let it out in a relieved puff when he saw the contents of the room. Racks of wine stood along one wall—a wine cellar, of course. But on the other wall were several bookcases. There had been many bookshelves throughout the house—Tony was either a big reader or wanted to be seen as one. But these books were different—they were bound in leather and looked very old. Probably valuable—didn’t old books need to be kept in dark, cool places? It all made sense. He couldn’t believe he’d been scared of a basement, as if he were a little kid.

A desk sat in the corner, and on the desk was an open book on a stand, several pieces of paper, an assortment of ink wells, and an old-fashioned fountain pen. The papers were covered in practice calligraphy—must be a hobby of Tony’s. That would explain the fancy note he left. The book was opened to a page that was clearly a work in progress. On the left was an illustration of a naked man in a garden. A snake was wrapped around one arm; in his hand, he held an apple. The drawing was finished, but it was only partially colored. Was Tony an artist too?

The opposite page contained a poem written in calligraphy. It looked like something out of a medieval manuscript. He sat down so that he could read it.

Adam lay ibounden,

     Bounden in a bond;

Four thousand winter

     Thoght he not too long;

And all was for an appil,

     An appil that he tok,

As clerkes finden

     Wreten in here book.

Ne hadde the appil take ben,

     The appil taken ben,

Ne hadde never our lady

     A ben hevene quene.

Blessed be the time

     That appil take was.

Therefore we moun singen

     "Deo gracias."

As he puzzled over the meaning, his gaze drifted to another door. He hadn’t noticed it before—it was so gray it blended in with the wall.  

He approached the door and put his hand on the knob. It wouldn’t open. In all of his exploration, this was the only lock he’d encountered. What could be in there that was more valuable than jewelry, luxury vehicles, stereos, wine, and antique books? He remembered the key around Tony’s neck—what had he said? It’s the key to my heart. Something personal, maybe? Or maybe cash. Nacho hadn’t encountered any safes yet, and Tony seemed to like to keep cash on hand.

He rattled the doorknob to see if it would unstick. Not that he would steal from him, probably. He was already walking out of this deal with $11K—it would be stupid to get even greedier. But he was curious, and the rest of the house had been so open.

No luck. That was when he noticed a smell—faint but foul, like a mixture of rotten meat and fruit. The ominous feeling he’d had before returned, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end, but he quashed it. He wasn’t a little kid. Basements smelled weird sometimes. Maybe there was a meat freezer in there that was malfunctioning.

Still, he found himself suddenly eager to leave. He ascended the stairs and shut the door firmly behind him.

[wildstar25]

[slight shadowbringers / lv 80 summoner job spoilers]

So I was having a very normal amount of thoughts regarding the summoner class the other day. Mostly how as your character learns the job with Y'mhitra they are taught to summon specific primals outlined in ancient teachings; but the moment your WOL is given the chance to create a summon on their own, they come up with Phoenix. assuming your WOL went through the coils storyline and has any connection to 1.0 stuff, that's a really personal choice for them to make!

Though the lack of fanfare when you receive that skill does make it feel like you get the summon to call back to the widespread accounts of Phoenix sightings at the Battle of Carteneau. I feel like that might be more of a product of how there's no longer job quests when you hit ShB. Though I enjoyed the stormblood follow up content for that lv 80 quest, I wish they had made it about how the WOL created demi-phoenix...

Anyways, it got me thinking about how instead of ifrit, titan, and garuda, summoner WOLs could instead use egi's that they have a more personal connection with. Of course this means I started thinking about what Arsay's egi's would be. Which also means of course I had to sketch them out. These are super quick designs obviously and I haven't gone through the effort of a proper design cycle so bare that in mind lol. Content under the cut!

Ruby summon: Egi-Ifrit -> Sapphire summon: Egi-Leviathan

The first primal Arsay ever saw, though that memory has been lost to time in the aether stream. It was his appearance in the Rhontano sea that prompted the meeting between a new adventurer and a scion of great import to her. Even if their minds have forgotten such events, the summoner's aether has not. Aetherial element: Water

Topaz summon: Egi-Titan -> Pearl summon: Egi-Bismark

Despite the beast itself creating yet another roadblock in her adventures, Arsay can't help but be reminded of more immediate and positive associations. Her favourite eatery in Limsa of whom he is the name sake, the always perfectly timed arrival and rescue of her friend Cid, and of course the gentle reflection who provided aid in their time of need. Aetherial Element: Wind

Emerald summon: Egi-Garuda -> Fluorite summon: Fluorite Carbuncle

Though the power of a third primal might be tempting to most, Arsay knows a carbuncle can be as powerful as the summoner wills it to be. Plus it's much cuter! Using a crystal she gathered around Revenant's Toll as a focus, she called forth from the aether her own form of carbuncle Aetherial Element: Lightning

Obviously by lv 90 you swap your egi's for the real deal so instead her carbuncle would get super charged ✌️

Again I thought way too hard about this (as per usual). I wanted to have the elements line up with what you have access to as Ninja. Since that's her main job it would make sense that her aether would be more likely to lean towards those elements. Phoenix covers fire, so unfortunately the only one missing would be ice. There's more wind-coded abilities than ice, so I went with that. Which is for the best because it lines up with the aether elemental chart flow! Water goes to wind goes to lightning.

Idk if all these ideas line up exactly with the ffxiv summoner lore - I've been doing the best I can to absorb all the info I get from the job quests but very possible I missed something along the way lol

Have a gpose for making it to the end o/

[tourettes-swag-tournament]

hi friends! haven't forgotten about this, i promise! just been busy lately... again lol anyways i was so hyperfixated on something that i forgot what date it was and turns out yesterday was ts awareness day!!!

imma spam reblog some ts awareness posts later night as well as posts with headcanons about characters! if you have ever made a post talking about ts or headcanoning a character with it, PLEASE tag me in it or send it to me so i can reblog it here and from my main account!!!